Chapter 9

 

  THE FAMILY AFTERWARD

 

OUR WOMEN FOLK have suggested certain atti-

-tudes a wife may take with the husband who is

recovering. Perhaps they created the impression that

he is to be wrapped in cotton wool and placed on a

pedestal. Successful readjustment means the opposite.

All members of the family should meet upon the com-

mon ground of tolerance, understanding and love.

This involves a process of deflation. The alcoholic,

his wife, his children, his “in-laws,” each one is likely

to have fixed ideas about the family’s attitude towards

himself or herself. Each is interested in having his or

her wishes respected. We find the more one member

of the family demands that the others concede to him,

the more resentful they become. This makes for dis-

cord and unhappiness.

   And why? Is it not because each wants to play the

lead? Is not each trying to arrange the family show to

his liking? Is he not unconsciously trying to see what

he can take from the family life rather than give?

  (See BB Page 60 Bottom)

   Cessation of drinking is but the first step away from

a highly strained, abnormal condition.

   (See BB 19:1, 127:2)

           A doctor said

to us, “Years of living with an alcoholic is almost sure

to make any wife or child neurotic. The entire family

is, to some extent, ill.” Let families realize, as they

start their journey, that all will not be fair weather.

Each in his turn may be footsore and may straggle.

 

    122

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  123

 

There will be alluring shortcuts and by-paths down

which they may wander and lose their way.

   Suppose we tell you some of the obstacles a family

will meet; suppose we suggest how they may be

avoided-even converted to good use for others. The

family of an alcoholic longs for the return of happiness

and security. They remember when father was ro-

mantic, thoughtful and successful. Today’s life is

measured against that of other years and, when it falls

short, the family may be unhappy.

   Family confidence in dad is rising high. The good

old days will soon be back, they think. Sometimes

they demand that dad bring them back instantly!

God, they believe, almost owes this recompense on a

long overdue account. But the head of the house has

spent years in pulling down the structures of business,

romance, friendship, health-these things are now

ruined or damaged. It will take time to clear away the

wreck. Though old buildings will eventually be re-

placed by finer ones, the new structures will take years

to complete.

 

  A whole lifetime geared to self-centeredness cannot be

  set in reverse all at once. Rebellion dogs our every step at first.

   T&T 73  Step Seven

 

   Father knows he is to blame; it may take him many

seasons of hard work to be restored financially, but he

shouldn’t be reproached. Perhaps he will never have

much money again. But the wise family will admire

him for what he is trying to be, rather than for what

he is trying to get.

   (See BB 82:2, 127:1)

 

  The alcoholic, realizing what his wife has endured, and now

  fully understanding how much he himself did to damage her

  and his children, nearly always takes up his marriage

  responsibilities with a willingness to repair what he can and to

  accept what he can't. He persistently tries all of A.A.'s Twelve

  Steps in his home, often with fine results.

   T&T Page 119 Step Twelve

 

   Now and then the family will be plagued by spectres

from the past, for the drinking career of almost every

alcoholic has been marked by escapades, funny, hu-

miliating, shameful or tragic.

   (See BB 16:1)

       The first impulse will be

to bury these skeletons in a dark closet and padlock

the door. The family may be possessed by the idea

 

 124  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

that future happiness can be based only upon forget-

fulness of the past. We think that such a view is self-

centered and in direct conflict with the new way of

living.

   (See BB 83 Bottom)

   Henry Ford once made a wise remark to the effect

that experience is the thing of supreme value in life.

That is true only if one is willing to turn the past to

good account. We grow by our willingness to face

and rectify errors and convert them into assets. The

alcoholic’s past thus becomes the principal asset of the

family and frequently it is almost the only one!

   This painful past may be of infinite value to other

families still struggling with their problem. We think

each family which has been relieved owes something

to those who have not, and when the occasion re-

quires, each member of it should be only too willing

to bring former mistakes, no matter how grievous, out

of their hiding places. Showing others who suffer how

we were given help is the very thing which makes life

seem so worth while to us now.

   (See BB 89:2)

           Cling to the thought

that, in God’s hands, the dark past is the greatest pos-

session you have-the key to life and happiness for

others. With it you can avert death and misery for

them.

   (See BB 84 Top [5])

   It is possible to dig up past misdeeds so they become

a blight, a veritable plague. For example, we know of

situations in which the alcoholic or his wife have had

love affairs.

   (See BB 105:1, 106:1)

  In the first flush of spiritual experience

they forgave each other and drew closer together. The

miracle of reconciliation was at hand. Then, under

one provocation or another, the aggrieved one would

unearth the old affair and angrily cast its ashes about.

A few of us have had these growing pains and they

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  125

 

hurt a great deal. Husbands and wives have some-

times been obliged to separate for a time until new

perspective, new victory over hurt pride could be re-

won. In most cases, the alcoholic survived this ordeal

without relapse, but not always. So we think that

unless some good and useful purpose is to be served,

past occurrences should not be discussed.

   (See BB 81:1-82 Top)

   We families of Alcoholics Anonymous keep few

skeletons in the closet. Everyone knows about the

others’ alcoholic troubles. This is a condition which,

in ordinary life, would produce untold grief; there

might be scandalous gossip, laughter at the expense of

other people, and a tendency to take advantage of in-

timate information. Among us, these are rare occur-

rences. We do talk about each other a great deal, but

we almost invariably temper such talk by a spirit of

love and tolerance.

   Another principle we observe carefully is that we do

not relate intimate experiences of another person un-

less we are sure he would approve. We find it better,

when possible, to stick to our own stories. A man may

criticize or laugh at himself and it will affect others

favorably, but criticism or ridicule coming from an-

other often produces the contrary effect. Members of

a family should watch such matters carefully, for one

careless, inconsiderate remark has been known to raise

the very devil. We alcoholics are sensitive people. It

takes some of us a long time to outgrow that serious

handicap.

 

      When A.A. was quite

  young, a number of eminent psychologists and doctors

  made an exhaustive study of a good-sized group of so-

  called problem drinkers. The doctors weren't trying to find

  how different we were from one another; they sought to

  find whatever personality traits, if any, this group of alco-

  holics had in common. They finally came up with a

  conclusion that shocked the A.A. members of that time.

  These distinguished men had the nerve to say that most of

  the alcoholics under investigation were still childish, emo-

  tionally sensitive, and grandiose.

   T&T 122-123  Step Twelve

 

   Many alcoholics are enthusiasts. They run to ex-

tremes. At the beginning of recovery a man will take,

as a rule, one of two directions. He may either plunge

into a frantic attempt to get on his feet in business, or

 

 126  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

he may be so enthralled by his new life that he talks

or thinks of little else. In either case certain family

problems will arise. With these we have had experi-

ence galore.

   We think it dangerous if he rushes headlong at his

economic problem. The family will be affected also,

pleasantly at first, as they feel their money troubles

are about to be solved, then not so pleasantly as they

find themselves neglected. Dad may be tired at night

and preoccupied by day. He may take small interest

in the children and may show irritation when reproved

for his delinquencies. If not irritable, he may seem

dull and boring, not gay and affectionate as the family

would like him to be. Mother may complain of inat-

tention. They are all disappointed, and often let him

feel it. Beginning with such complaints, a barrier

arises. He is straining every nerve to make up for lost

time. He is striving to recover fortune and reputation

and feels he is doing very well.

 

  The spectacle of years of waste threw us into panic. There

  simply wouldn't be time, we thought, to rebuild our shat-

  tered fortunes. How could we ever take care of those awful

  debts, possess a decent home, educate the kids, and set

  something by for old age? Financial importance was no

  longer our principal aim; we now clamored for material se-

  curity. Even when we were well reestablished in our

  business, these terrible fears often continued to haunt us.

  This made us misers and penny pinchers all over again.

  Complete financial security we must have— or else...

 

  This all meant, of course, that we were still far off bal-

  ance. When a job still looked like a mere means of getting

  money rather than an opportunity for service, when the ac-

  quisition of money for financial independence looked more

  important than a right dependence upon God, we were still

  the victims of unreasonable fears.

   T&T 121  Step Twelve

 

   Sometimes mother and children don’t think so.

Having been neglected and misused in the past, they

think father owes them more than they are getting.

They want him to make a fuss over them. They expect

him to give them the nice times they used to have be-

fore he drank so much, and to show his contrition for

what they suffered. But dad doesn’t give freely of

himself. Resentment grows. He becomes still less

communicative. Sometimes he explodes over a trifle.

The family is mystified. They criticize, pointing out

how he is falling down on his spiritual program.

   This sort of thing can be avoided. Both father and

the family are mistaken, though each side may have

some justification. It is of little use to argue and only

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  127

 

makes the impasse worse. The family must realize that

dad, though marvelously improved, is still convalesc-

ing. They should be thankful he is sober and able to

be of this world once more. Let them praise his prog-

ress. Let them remember that his drinking wrought

all kinds of damage that may take long to repair. If

they sense these things, they will not take so seriously

his periods of crankiness, depression, or apathy, which

will disappear when there is tolerance, love, and spir-

itual understanding.

 

      This does not mean that we expect

  all our character defects to be lifted out of us as the drive to

  drink was. A few of them may be, but with most of them

  we shall have to be content with patient improvement.

   T&T 65  Step Six

 

   The head of the house ought to remember that he is

mainly to blame for what befell his home. He can

scarcely square the account in his lifetime.

   (See BB 82:2, 123:2-3)

        But he

must see the danger of over-concentration on financial

success. Although financial recovery is on the way for

many of us, we found we could not place money first.

For us, material well-being always followed spiritual

progress; it never preceded.

   Since the home has suffered more than anything

else, it is well that a man exert himself there. He is

not likely to get far in any direction if he fails to show

unselfishness and love under his own roof.

   (See BB 19:1, 122:3)

         We know

there are difficult wives and families, but the man who

is getting over alcoholism must remember he did much

to make them so.

   As each member of a resentful family begins to see

his shortcomings

   (See BB 59 Step 4)

         and admits them to the others,

   (See BB 59 Step 5)

       he

lays a basis for helpful discussion. These family talks

will be constructive if they can be carried on without

heated argument, self-pity, self-justification or resent-

ful criticism. Little by little, mother and children will

see they ask too much, and father will see he gives too

 

 128  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

little. Giving, rather than getting, will become the

guiding principle.

   Assume on the other hand that father has, at the

outset, a stirring spiritual experience. Overnight, as

it were, he is a different man. He becomes a religious

enthusiast. He is unable to focus on anything else. As

soon as his sobriety begins to be taken as a matter of

course, the family may look at their strange new dad

with apprehension, then with irritation. There is talk

about spiritual matters morning, noon and night. He

may demand that the family find God in a hurry, or

exhibit amazing indifference to them and say he is

above worldly considerations. He may tell mother,

who has been religious all her life, that she doesn’t

know what it’s all about, and that she had better get

his brand of spirituality while there is yet time.

 

         After the husband

  joins A.A., the wife may become discontented, even highly

  resentful that Alcoholics Anonymous has done the very

  thing that all her years of devotion had failed to do. Her

  husband may become so wrapped up in A.A. and his new

  friends that he is inconsiderately away from home more

  than when he drank. Seeing her unhappiness, he recom-

  mends A.A.'s Twelve Steps and tries to teach her how to

  live. She naturally feels that for years she has made a far

  better job of living than he has. Both of them blame each

  other and ask when their marriage is ever going to be happy

  again. They may even begin to suspect it had never been

  any good in the first place.

   T&T 118-119  Step Twelve

 

   When father takes this tack, the family may react

unfavorably. They may be jealous of a God who has

stolen dad’s affections. While grateful that he drinks

no more, they may not like the idea that God has ac-

complished the miracle where they failed. They often

forget father was beyond human aid.

  (See BB Page 118:4)

         They may not

see why their love and devotion did not straighten

him out. Dad is not so spiritual after all, they say. If

he means to right his past wrongs, why all this concern

for everyone in the world but his family? What about

his talk that God will take care of them? They suspect

father is a bit balmy!

   He is not so unbalanced as they might think. Many

of us have experienced dad’s elation. We have in-

dulged in spiritual intoxication. Like a gaunt pros-

pector, belt drawn in over the last ounce of food, our

pick struck gold. Joy at our release from a lifetime of

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  129

 

frustration knew no bounds. Father feels he has struck

something better than gold. For a time he may try to

hug the new treasure to himself. He may not see at

once that he has barely scratched a limitless lode

which will pay dividends only if he mines it for the

rest of his life and insists on giving away the entire

product.

   If the family cooperates, dad will soon see that he is

suffering from a distortion of values. He will perceive

that his spiritual growth is lopsided, that for an aver-

age man like himself, a spiritual life which does not

include his family obligations may not be so perfect

after all. If the family will appreciate that dad’s cur-

rent behavior is but a phase of his development, all

will be well. In the midst of an understanding and

sympathetic family, these vagaries of dad’s spiritual

infancy will quickly disappear.

   (See BB 119 Bottom)

   The opposite may happen should the family con-

demn and criticize. Dad may feel that for years his

drinking has placed him on the wrong side of every

argument, but that now he has become a superior per-

son with God on his side. If the family persists in

criticism, this fallacy may take a still greater hold on

father. Instead of treating the family as he should, he

may retreat further into himself and feel he has spiri-

tual justification for so doing.

   Though the family does not fully agree with dad’s

spiritual activities, they should let him have his head.

Even if he displays a certain amount of neglect and

irresponsibility towards the family, it is well to let him

go as far as he likes in helping other alcoholics.

   (See BB 119:1, 146:1)

       Dur-

ing those first days of convalescence, this will do more

to insure his sobriety than anything else. Though

 

 130  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

some of his manifestations are alarming and disagree-

able, we think dad will be on a firmer foundation than

the man who is placing business or professional suc-

cess ahead of spiritual development. He will be less

likely to drink again, and anything is preferable to

that.

   Those of us who have spent much time in the world

of spiritual make-believe have eventually seen the

childishness of it. This dream world has been replaced

by a great sense of purpose, accompanied by a grow-

ing consciousness of the power of God in our lives.

We have come to believe He would like us to keep our

heads in the clouds with Him, but that our feet ought

to be firmly planted on earth. That is where our fel-

low travelers are, and that is where our work must be

done. These are the realities for us. We have found

nothing incompatible between a powerful spiritual

experience and a life of sane and happy usefulness.

   One more suggestion: Whether the family has spiri-

tual convictions or not, they may do well to examine the

principles by which the alcoholic member is trying to

live. They can hardly fail to approve these simple

principles, though the head of the house still fails

somewhat in practicing them. Nothing will help the

man who is off on a spiritual tangent so much as the

wife who adopts a sane spiritual program, making a

better practical use of it.  (See BB 119:2)

   There will be other profound changes in the house-

hold. Liquor incapacitated father for so many years

that mother became head of the house. She met these

responsibilities gallantly. By force of circumstances,

she was often obliged to treat father as a sick or way-

ward child. Even when he wanted to assert himself

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  131

 

he could not, for his drinking placed him constantly

in the wrong. Mother made all the plans and gave the

directions. When sober, father usually obeyed. Thus

mother, through no fault of her own, became accus-

tomed to wearing the family trousers. Father, coming

suddenly to life again, often begins to assert himself.  

This means trouble, unless the family watches for

these tendencies in each other and comes to a friendly

agreement about them.

 

  When alcoholism strikes, very unnatural situations may

  develop which work against marriage partnership and

  compatible union. If the man is affected, the wife must

  become the head of the house, often the breadwinner.

  As matters get worse, the husband becomes a sick and

  irresponsible child who needs to be looked after and

  extricated from endless scrapes and impasses. Very

  gradually, and usually without any realization of the fact,

  the wife is forced to become the mother of an erring boy.

  And if she had a strong maternal instinct to begin with, the

  situation is aggravated. Obviously not much partnership

  can exist under these conditions. The wife usually goes

  on doing the best she knows how, but meanwhile the

  alcoholic alternately loves and hates her maternal care.

  A pattern is thereby established that may take a lot of

  undoing later on. Nevertheless, under the influence of

  A.A.'s Twelve Steps, these situations are often set right.

   T&T Page 118 Step Twelve

 

   Drinking isolates most homes from the outside

world.

   (See BB 105:3, 119:2, 177:2)

 Father may have laid aside for years all normal

activities-clubs, civic duties, sports. When he renews

interest in such things, a feeling of jealousy may arise.

The family may feel they hold a mortgage on dad, so

big that no equity should be left for outsiders. Instead

of developing new channels of activity for themselves,

mother and children demand that he stay home and

make up the deficiency.

   At the very beginning, the couple ought to frankly

face the fact that each will have to yield here and

there if the family is going to play an effective part in

the new life.

   (See BB 99:2, 120:1)

         Father will necessarily spend much time

with other alcoholics, but this activity should be

balanced.

  (See BB Page 119:1)

         New acquaintances who know nothing of

alcoholism might be made and thoughtful considera-

tion given their needs. The problems of the commu-

nity might engage attention. Though the family has

no religious connections, they may wish to make con-

tact with or take membership in a religious body.  (See BB 74 Top)

   Alcoholics who have derided religious people will

be helped by such contacts. Being possessed of a

spiritual experience, the alcoholic will find he has

much in common with these people, though he may

 

 132  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

differ with them on many matters. If he does not

argue about religion, he will make new friends and is

sure to find new avenues of usefulness and pleasure.

He and his family can be a bright spot in such con-

gregations. He may bring new hope and new courage

to many a priest, minister, or rabbi, who gives his all

to minister to our troubled world. We intend the fore-

going as a helpful suggestion only. So far as we are

concerned, there is nothing obligatory about it. As

non-denominational people, we cannot make up

others’ minds for them. Each individual should con-

sult his own conscience.  (See BB 28:4)

   We have been speaking to you of serious, sometimes

tragic things. We have been dealing with alcohol in its

worst aspect. But we aren’t a glum lot. If newcomers

could see no joy or fun in our existence, they wouldn’t

want it. We absolutely insist on enjoying life.

   (See BB 16:2, 152:1)

          We try

not to indulge in cynicism over the state of the nations,

nor do we carry the world’s troubles on our shoulders.

   (See BB 61:2)

When we see a man sinking into the mire that is alco-

holism, we give him first aid and place what we have

at his disposal. For his sake, we do recount and almost

relive the horrors of our past. But those of us who have

tried to shoulder the entire burden and trouble of

others find we are soon overcome by them.

   So we think cheerfulness and laughter make for use-

fulness. Outsiders are sometimes shocked when we

burst into merriment over a seemingly tragic experi-

ence out of the past. But why shouldn’t we laugh?

We have recovered, and have been given the power

to help others.

   (See BB 16:2)

   Everybody knows that those in bad health, and

those who seldom play, do not laugh much. So let

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  133

 

each family play together or separately, as much as

their circumstances warrant. We are sure God wants

us to be happy, joyous, and free.

   (See BB 15:2)

     We cannot subscribe

to the belief that this life is a vale of tears, though it

once was just that for many of us. But it is clear that

we made our own misery. God didn’t do it. Avoid

then, the deliberate manufacture of misery, but if

trouble comes, cheerfully capitalize it as an oppor-

tunity to demonstrate His omnipotence.

   Now about health: A body badly burned by alcohol

does not often recover overnight nor do twisted think-

ing and depression vanish in a twinkling. We are con-

vinced that a spiritual mode of living is a most power-

ful health restorative. We, who have recovered

from serious drinking, are miracles of mental health.

   (See BB 11:5, 153:1, 161 Top)

             But

we have seen remarkable transformations in our

bodies. Hardly one of our crowd now shows any mark

of dissipation.

   But this does not mean that we disregard human

health measures. God has abundantly supplied this

world with fine doctors, psychologists, and practition-

ers of various kinds. Do not hesitate to take your

health problems to such persons. Most of them give

freely of themselves, that their fellows may enjoy

sound minds and bodies. Try to remember that

though God has wrought miracles among us, we

should never belittle a good doctor or psychiatrist.

Their services are often indispensable in treating a

newcomer and in following his case afterward.

   One of the many doctors who had the opportunity

of reading this book in manuscript form told us that

the use of sweets was often helpful, of course depend-

ing upon a doctor’s advice. He thought all alcoholics

 

 134  ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS

 

should constantly have chocolate available for its

quick energy value at times of fatigue. He added that

occasionally in the night a vague craving arose which

would be satisfied by candy. Many of us have noticed

a tendency to eat sweets and have found this practice

beneficial.

   A word about sex relations. Alcohol is so sexually

stimulating to some men that they have over-indulged.

Couples are occasionally dismayed to find that when

drinking is stopped the man tends to be impotent. Un-

less the reason is understood, there may be an emo-

tional upset. Some of us had this experience, only to

enjoy, in a few months, a finer intimacy than ever.

There should be no hesitancy in consulting a doctor or

psychologist if the condition persists. We do not

know of many cases where this difficulty lasted long.

   The alcoholic may find it hard to re-establish

friendly relations with his children. Their young

minds were impressionable while he was drinking.

Without saying so, they may cordially hate him for

what he has done to them and to their mother. The

children are sometimes dominated by a pathetic hard-

ness and cynicism. They cannot seem to forgive and

forget. This may hang on for months, long after their

mother has accepted dad’s new way of living and

thinking.

   In time they will see that he is a new man and in

their own way they will let him know it. When this

happens, they can be invited to join in morning med-

itation and then they can take part in the daily discus-

sion without rancor or bias. From that point on,

progress will be rapid. Marvelous results often follow

such a reunion.

 

 THE FAMILY AFTERWARD  135

 

   Whether the family goes on a spiritual basis or not,

the alcoholic member has to if he would recover. The

others must be convinced of his new status beyond the

shadow of a doubt. Seeing is believing to most fam-

ilies who have lived with a drinker.

  Here is a case in point: One of our friends is a heavy

smoker and coffee drinker. There was no doubt he

over-indulged. Seeing this, and meaning to be help-

ful, his wife commenced to admonish him about it. He

admitted he was overdoing these things, but frankly

said that he was not ready to stop. His wife is one of

those persons who really feels there is something

rather sinful about these commodities, so she nagged,

and her intolerance finally threw him into a fit of anger.

He got drunk.

   Of course our friend was wrong-dead wrong. He

had to painfully admit that and mend his spiritual

fences. Though he is now a most effective member of

Alcoholics Anonymous, he still smokes and drinks

coffee, but neither his wife nor anyone else stands in

judgment. She sees she was wrong to make a burning

issue out of such a matter when his more serious ail-

ments were being rapidly cured.

   We have three little mottoes which are apropos.

Here they are:

   First Things First

  Live and Let Live

  Easy Does It.

   (See BB 118:2)